They hurt.
Somehow, nothing seems to be going right this month. TGI-only-few-more-months-before-summer-vacation.
After weeks of planning and revising, I submitted the Target Field Trip Grant back in November and finally heard back the first week when I came back from Christmas vacation. I wanted to organize a field trip for the MESA (our after-school math, science and engineering club) students to Albuquerque, but the distance, lodging and food will be costly in the end, and the little money we do have is definitely not enough. The grant is to provide for transportation and hotel fees. I was elated to find out that we received $800 from Target (my favorite mass retailer). Last year when I attempted to apply, I asked the principal, who was not sure (or accustomed) to teachers applying to independent organizations for grants, made a call to the central office and gave the OK. Unfortunately, I was a little too ambitious in the amount and too carefree on the application. Ultimately, I did not receive it. But this year is different, I thought, since I carefully budgeted out the spending, planned out specific assessment and objectives for the field trip, the hard work is finally paying off!
When I walked in the principal's office, I needed his signature in order to receive the check. He knitted his gray, thick eyebrows immediately, "Did you go through the business office? School board? Did you contact the superintendent? Did you call these hundreds of people on the district directory?" I was under the impression that I was OK to proceed since I already applied last year. No, I replied, I did not spend pointless effort calling people who don't give a shizzle for our club just so I can continue to put in more work in writing my own grant.
After another few phone calls, he came to me in the afternoon and said, "You are going to have to turn that down. Didn't follow district protocol."
... ... ... ...
"Why give away free money??" was the response I received several colleagues who sympathized.
At some point, one has to give in to bureaucracy, not just feeling powerless, but utterly ridiculous.
Incident two. I invited a local activist against an impending power plant that will be build just miles off the road, near communities and schools, to my classroom to tell her story. Since we are learning nonrenewable and renewable energy resources (following the standard!), I thought this guest talk would be completely relevant, local, real-world issues, thought-provoking, and educational. Since there are always two sides to everything, I was also planning to invite the power plant people to speak to the students.
The activist's talk was during the first week of school. At first, I was worried by her monotonous voice, that perhaps students would be bored and begin to fidget. I was amazed to find that they were all extremely attentive, respectful, quiet, and few even had questions! They were understanding a local issue! They were into it! I was so excited for them!
But of course, anything new and radical is bound to be reprimanded. The following day, I was called into the principal's office like a student waiting to be disciplined. "Your speaker yesterday was very inappropriate. Too political, we can't make the school political. In the future, reference all your speakers to see if they have a political agenda." I was surprised that he didn't reprimand me for not checking their criminal background like some colleagues may suggest, but instead wanted me to check for their agenda. In fact, a speaker's agenda is set by the teacher, at least in this case. I WANTED her to talk about issues that are close to home, issues that would affect the students' lives and families, so they can be exposed to different perspectives, especially since many have no idea what Desert Rock means. She was scheduled to return the next day to speak to the other half of the students, what I was supposed to do? "I don't want her to come back. I don't want her to come back." So... you are limiting half of the student body to not hear this woman's story, wouldn't that be even more political? "I don't care, she's not to come back." Of course, I was the news breaker, fueled by frustration and anger.
What about evolution? That is both a religious AND political issue. How can one separate science and the real world? Everything is about relating classroom material to RELEVANT events so students can RELATE, build prior knowledge, and learning can begin.
Our education system, at least in this area, is completely screwed up, with creepy white men running this district and school board who have no way of relating to the students living on the reservation, who have ailing family members, livestock to tend to, clans of brothers, sisters, nephews, and nieces who need babysitting, and relatives, if not themselves, affected by social ills such as alcoholism, drugs, and gambling. The messed up stories around here coming from exasperated voices we hear everyday are no longer movie material, but simply heart-breaking and incredible.
What is the solution? Turning potential, young, enthusiastic individuals away from education after some classroom experience dealing with students, parents, and administration is the worst of them all.
I'm tired of all this. Leaving is perhaps my only light at the end of the tunnel.
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